Leesfragment: Nova Scotia House

01 april 2025, door Charlie Porter

Het Boek van de Maand van Athenaeum Boekhandel Spui: Charlie Porters romandebuut Nova Scotia House! Lees nu een fragment op onze site en koop dat boek!

He said he would understand if it was too much for me, that I could leave him, that I was young, I should be living, I said to him, I am living.

Johnny Grant faces stark life decisions. Seeking answers, he looks back to his relationship with Jerry Field. When they met, nearly thirty years ago, Johnny was 19, Jerry was 45. They fell in love and made a life on their own terms in Jerry’s flat: 1, Nova Scotia House. Johnny is still there today – but Jerry is gone, and so is the world they knew.

As Johnny’s mind travels between then and now, he begins to remember stories of Jerry’s youth: of experiments in living; of radical philosophies; of the many possibilities of love, sex and friendship before the AIDS crisis devastated the queer community. Slowly, he realizes what he must do next—and attempts to restore ways of being that could be lost forever.

Nova Scotia House takes us to the heart of a relationship, a community and an era. It is both a love story and a lament; bearing witness to the enduring pain of the AIDS pandemic and honouring the joys and creativity of queer life. Intimate, visionary, and profoundly original, it marks the debut of a vibrant new voice in contemporary fiction, and a writer with a liberating new story to tell.

1

Let me sort through who I am. Won’t take long. Paintings by Jerry. Some books that don’t depress me. Furniture is Jerry’s, mostly, made by his friends. Two pairs of sneakers, a pair of boots. Two coats – a waterproof and a duffel, back of the door – mine, not his. Jerry’s diaries are upstairs, our letters, our paper trail. It is safe.
Stones and stones and stones on shelves. Stones to remember a beach or a time and brought home and they become a stone on the shelf no memory of where it was from or when just stones. I’m so used to the stones I see them and I don’t see. Not seeing is more than seeing.
This room is open plan and nothing really and I like that nothing. I come in and there is the kitchen and there is the lounge and there is the door and there is the garden where I grow what I can to eat. It is all the same and one is the other and this is how I like things. I do not want to leave it.
Downstairs is all one room. Upstairs there are rooms but these are not my walls I cannot knock them down so what can I do. Often I sleep down here, in the light, it is better. I don’t understand that, sleep in a darkened room. I don’t get it I want to see light. I’d sleep in the garden if I could I really would. Things are dying now in the garden I love it. Wait. They’re not dying they’re dying back.
Almost sunset. The light, we had this light, we have always had this light. They are building those flats, the light will be blocked, that will be it, we will not be able to grow. I don’t want to leave I will have to leave I can’t leave. Can I stay here why stay here. I don’t want to think about it now. I don’t want to think. What can I do.
Wait there’s more to crop. I missed those tomatoes. End of the season that never ends.
I want a beer and I want that guy to come over and I know he won’t come over so why do I bother when I know he won’t be coming over. He comes over when he wants to come over and never at my call. It’s such a game. Let’s look and see if he’s on yeah he’s on yeah he’s ignoring me. The game is the game. What is the game. Can I get out. Do I want to get out. Can I try.
Wait, somebody else. Looks OK. Ha. OK he’s alright. Haha OK he knows what he wants. Yeah OK why not. I’ll give him the address. Flat 1, Nova Scotia House.

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